two guys trying to find two girls. they've got to be perfect. most aren't.

Oh no! The family...

Guy Two — Sun, 22 Jul 2007 13:15:38 GMT

Went round her house the other day. Hanging out and films planned. Met her family.

Status:

Father
Seems OK. Apparently he doesn’t mind me. Probably won’t hunt me down and warn me not to hurt his princess.

Mother
Very quiet. I must have said at least 4-5 words to her. Little is known here. Could go either way. Fingers crossed.

Brother
I’ve met her brother a couple of times before (less scary than meeting parents). Actually seems to like me. No problems there. Is away a lot for College.

Slightly less hideous than I was expecting. My natural (and clumsy) charm must have helped. I’ve all ready been asked on holiday with the immediate family [insert slight panic here] but as it’s just for a weekend and her brother is also coming (possible backup) then I’ll survive. I have plenty of time to prepare too, its at the start of September so I shouldn’t be digging any holes by then.

I’m wanting to spend more time with her (yes, like that!) but sadly this is harder than it should be. Always seems to be a few friends around all the time. Hopefully she’s lose the wing…girls? To be fair we’re never in the right place for anything. But still, fun can be had…

bq. Guy Two: (Pause for reflection)

Anyway I need more sleep. Might be seeing her tomorrow so with any luck I won’t look like a zombie. Also apologies as it has been a while since my last post. Distractions you know…

Guy One hasn’t posted anything in a while either so I’ll try and wake him up. I’m pretty sure he has some important news.

Night night and all that jazz

Happiness Ensues

Guy Two — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 21:56:30 GMT

Hey, It’s been a pretty cool week.

bq. Guy Two: At this point I need to give my new girl a name. Something Sexy and Interesting. Like… Kathy!

(OK. It’s not amazing. Stop laughing.)
Anyway so Kathy. Spent most of the week with her. Awesome! Was a minor embarrassing moment but we won’t go into that. Her friends are cool although I don’t know an awful lot of them. Fear I may be becoming “Kathy’s-Boyfriend-Who-We-Don’t-Know”.

Being a guy, however, has meant that I am constantly plagued by nerve destroying paranoia.
Hoorah!!

Am I being too clingy? Am I ignoring her? What did her text message mean? What did MY text message mean? Does she still like me? I want to go see her but that means less time with current friends. It’s all sooo confusing.

Luckily, she was interested in me first. And, although I’m pretty damn happy to be with her, that still means that she’s probably good with how things are. Girls, I suspect, must have this amount of worries too. Otherwise this undermines the whole of civilisation as we know it. Regardless, if she’s thinking along the same lines as me she has nothing to worry about. Really not going to stop seeing her.

bq. Guy Two: At this point I need to give Me a name (Why? Because I can.) Something Sexy and Interesting. Like Kathy…wait, no. Better still… Mike!

So. Paranoia has been quashed. Names have been called. And a good time was had by all.

Thank You and Goodnight.

Harumph

Guy One — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 20:23:11 GMT

Well, I can’t pretend to not be at all jealous of ‘The Other Guy’ but I’m also happy for him. In this sea of supposedly plenty more fishes, there is one less… rod? In other words, all the more for me!

Anyway… I think I left my last post saying “We’ll see what happens tomorrow” or similar. As the categories of this post suggest, nothing particularly happened. In fact, it seems that she doesn’t even consider me to be a part of her close group of friends. To that I say “Why the hell was I such a delusional idiot?” and the answer is quite simply: “To pass the time.”

So now, with a fresh eye, I cast my… eye… over the community. It seems there’s one girl I overlooked initially. She shall be known as Karen. She’s quirky, cheerful, outgoing and ‘kooky’. Upon talking to her more seriously, there’s a very tender and loving psyche that I want to protect. What from? I don’t know.

Essentially, she’s hot in every way. That’s probably been said before but to hell with it! Her personality is beautiful and reflects her physical presence.

Guy Two however went and asked ‘So you don’t mind that she’s taller than you?’ Which, of course, sets me into paranoia spirals but now I’m thinking that I don’t care at all. My brother would justify it with the phrase “Everyone is the same height lying down” but I think that it’s something so picky and trivial.

However, she has just signed on so I must depart to actually make the active, pro.

Crisis Averted!

Guy Two — Sun, 01 Jul 2007 10:15:54 GMT

The situation has been fixed.
Hang up the banners and start the parade, we have a winner.

Basically Guy One informed me that Sarah had someone where she was. So I start observing Kathy. She seemed…perfectly nice but nothing to really make me go for her.

We were just hanging out with a bunch of our friends the other day. She’s sitting next to me, head on my shoulder (look I’m not going to complain at this stage OK). Something happens and she moves away for a moment. I’m disappointed. A bit of thinking later and I realise that I do like her. A little more and I realise she’s pretty similar to myself personality-wise (a bit shy but quite clearly insane). Now if that’s not Perfect (or the next best thing) then I don’t know what is.

So I start acting a little more interested. And I’m pretty pleased with what’s happened so far. Things are moving quite slow but somehow that’s even better. I find myself thinking about her. It’s disconcerting to say the least. Nothing official yet but I’m pretty sure we’re effectivly going out now.

End Result: Win!

I guess I’d better give her a name at some point (I’ve put her name in when I thought of it) as the following blogs might have something about her in them. Although I suppose that my blogs will change from being a searching blog to being more of a trying-to-keep-hold-of blog. Fingers crossed.

Cya

Uber Crisis!

Guy Two — Fri, 22 Jun 2007 21:31:25 GMT

All right.
Problem!
Huge! Major! Problem!

As I previously said I have two choices (girl-wise of course, do keep up).

Girl One – Attractive. Up for it (in that way). Sadly far away.
Girl Two – Also attractive. Less up for it but definitely interested in me. Much closer to home.

The choice isn’t the annoying part. I could pick either one and pursue my ass off.
However neither of them is my PERFECT girl.
Which is what this blog/experiment/horrible mistake is all about…

What the hell do I do with that?
I’d just go and feel bad about pursuing them knowing that.
That’s not what we want. Not at all. We is not a happy bunny.

If only jim’d fix it…

In other news I might come up with a name (for me, can’t really use my real one)
ALSO : I Love Italics! I’m such a loser.

Byes!

Too perfect

Guy One — Sun, 17 Jun 2007 20:50:33 GMT

You know that feeling when you try to quit smoking, then you give in and have that orgasmic but shameful puff?

Well, I don’t know what it’s like. I’m imagining it might be a suitable parallel for my actions though. I want Elle.

I seem to be able to convince myself that she is arrogant, pretentious and generally ignores me. It works too! I can go for weeks thinking that. Simple bliss understanding that she is a nasty person and I am better with her out of my life.

But then she talks to me. Then I remember her breasts. But mostly I remember who she is. Yes, she is a bit arrogant, slightly pretentious and she does ignore me a bit but so what? That’s not a patch on how she makes me feel. I can talk to her about anything, and I probably have. I can listen to everything she says. I can argue with her for hours. She gets my humour! This is stuff that other people just shrug at saying “It’s just saying ‘Quonk’”.

So, I find myself saving my last cookie for her. A really nice one with three different kinds of Belgian chocolate. One that is making my mouth flood just by thinking about it. One that the baker must have cradled like a new born baby, kissed and loved.

Lets see how tomorrow goes.

Choices Choices...

Guy Two — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 23:43:27 GMT

Hey, me again. That’s right. Guy Two.
Don’t worry this one won’t be as long as the others. I’ve re-read my old ‘contributions’ and my congratulations go to those who made it through them.

Lets re-cap: * Hot girl (“Laura”), boyfriend issues, seems to like me. * Failure to attract Laura with best attempts * Shunted into ‘friend zone’ but promoted to Best Friend [insert happy face here] * Loss of interest in Laura (Note To Self: Find new girl)
There we go. Relatively painless. Much less so than the last couple of blogs.

Now to the real substance of the thing. Two Choices.

Choice 1:

A girl I used to like (Lets call her Sarah). We’re flirting back and forth. Realise she might actually have a thing for me. Question friends and so on. Discover she finds the idea of her and me “tempting”. Instant joy. In liquid form.

She’s shorter than me (A must have), pretty hot and, most importantly, would blatantly sex me (apologies for using ‘sex’ as a verb, nothing else works). She’s not a slut or anything. Far from it. She’s very respectable. Just…she’d clearly know what she’d be doing (Guy One will probably agree with me here). Sadly she lives far away. Far far away. I can see it becoming awkward. For me absence makes the heart wither and die in a small sad pile. Long distance, not good.

Choice 2:
New girl. Very new. Met her (properly)...I’d call it three, maybe four, days ago (We’ll call her Kathy). She’s pretty good looking. Again short (OK so I like short girls, its just a major preference). So we’re sitting around and chatting TODAY.
All of a sudden she wants my phone number. She’s messing with my stuff. She tied my shoes together. She gets my IM address from…somewhere.

bq. Guy One – It was me :P

All this switches on my, as until now, obsolete girl-interest-radar. Another contender for Guy-Two’s-New-Perfect-Girl

Choices Choices…
I may make a decision soon (leaning more toward choice 1).
Unfortunately all this new attention is making me panic slightly. So unused to it.

If I don’t die from making bad decisions, I’ll write a new blog soon.
Byes
Guy Two

Playing the field

Guy One — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 22:36:33 GMT

By that, I don’t mean it’s more like getting in the hole, I mean it’s a solo game.

There is _no-one_ out there at the moment. I’m in a sand-trap if you want to continue the golfing idea.

The Elle situation developed like so… she didn’t respond to any degree of interaction so I pretty much gave up.

Right now, the only person who I could get anywhere with is the sister of a brothers ex. I think it would be a bad idea.

I think I’m looking at things the wrong way though. Instead of looking for who I have a chance with, I should look at who would be perfect. That’s the entire point of this place! Perfect girls. So, ignoring any social restraints, sexuality, associated friends/groupies and history, the perfect girl would be… Elle.

Meh.

It’s not easy is it. “Maybe if I…”:http://bunny.frozenreality.co.uk/index.php?id=5

Look forward to an update from Guy Two who seems to be getting some lady attention. Should be interesting to hear his side of things… should be anyway.

We're not dead!

Guy Two, Guy One — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 08:53:17 GMT

Today heralds the return of two things. Firstly, my internet connection (GuyOne). So, a big yay from the crowd for that!

bq. Crowd: Yay!

The second thing to return is… well… two things. # GuyOne # GuyTwo

We were uncertain as to how popular this blog would be but it seems a grand (and we mean grand) total of 9 people have visited! It may sound meagre, but we only have 3 posts of any substance so it’s a good sign!

So… we’re back to writage! And we have news! Updates to come, after this commercial break. And by commercial, we mean snack. May take a couple of days but bear with us.

We would like to give a hugely stupendous, magnificently grand and all-round big thank you to Christina Wodtke for just being the most supportive person EVAR! (‘EVAR’ added by GuyTwo is his poor but endearing typographical ways.)

So, for now we say, in a traditional British styleé, “Toodle-pip”

X, what does it mean?

Guy One — Sun, 22 Apr 2007 21:21:03 GMT

I don’t want to talk too much about this for fear of bigging it up to something it’s not. But still…

Me and Elle were having a nice chat on IM. We were talking about a piece of work she’s doing. She’s writing a story. I helped where I could (and it promises to be a good read!). She liked the ideas. She listened to them.

She did make a reference to my appreciation of tight clothing… I can but hope that she appreciates it too, if you know what I’m saying… ;)

But, the conversation ended when she had to go sleep. After a quick debate with my mind, I added an ‘x’. She responded with a single x.

Without being overthinky, friends tend to use ‘xxxxxxx’. Nervous peope trying to show their feelings use ‘x’. Yeah?

Well, here’s hoping :P

Guy One

Story so far... (Guy Two) - Part Two

Guy Two — Sun, 22 Apr 2007 09:06:22 GMT

To clarify, my story starts way before guy one’s which is why it’s at least twice as long. My apologies if this bothers anyone (that is if anyone is actually reading this).

To recap, ‘Laura’ and her ex had issues. I grew less interested. It seemed as though I was back at square one, my search would have to begin anew. Girls that drew my interest came and went with startling rapidity (which goes to show that looks alone are not enough). Times were bad.

To continue, despite the disturbing closeness of ‘Laura’ and her ex ‘Will’ I was still talking to her. She’s good to talk to. I wasn’t just going to ignore her. It would seem that she was not entirely happy with the current situation. I suggested a few things, mainly involving the dispatching of the ex. A few times I sensed the hint of a flirt underneath her friendly words. She started telling me things that no-one else was told. I became a bit of a confidante. Things were looking up.

Then something happened that almost destroyed my faith in girls entirely. The gossip on the street was that my beloved ‘Laura’ had been seen at the local bar “making-out” with some guy. “Never!” said I, rather foolishly thinking that she wouldn’t stoop to such a level. Sources were tapped. Informers questioned. Basically, I asked her directly. As it turned out, thanks to the miracle of alcohol, she had indeed made-out with someone. A guy with a girlfriend no less. Horror. She regretted it, of course, as most people do. The part of me that was focused on girls started fraying at the edges. Cracks appeared. Interest waned yet again.

More time passed before I fully forgave her lapse in judgement. Nothing showed on my calm exterior however. I shared my worries with a work mate. Sympathy was offered. Normality was returned. It seems strange to me now that I didn’t give up on her. There was something about her though that allowed me to give her a final chance to prove herself worthy. Most likely her insanely good looks, I am a bit of a sucker for her at the moment.

Recently more interest has been shown towards me. Flirts are flying around more than before. She has hinted that she would be interested in a “fun relationship” with someone but that she tends to fall for people easily. A possible point of access into a relationship. I have received unrequested texts and phone calls from her. Not that I complained obviously. Why only yesterday she was disapointed not to be able to see me when we could have met up. However, always in the back of my mind lurks ‘Will’ and the hold he still has on her. Keeping her for himself. An accident may have to be arranged. I jest, of course, but it is an entertaining thought.

Thus we have made it, finally, to the present. I have shortened it as much as I feel possible whilst also keeping it fairly story like. Just the facts seemed a little dull to me. I have left out many minor instances where my interest decreased. Missing too, are a fair number of things which made the whole thing seem possible along the way. The flirting, the texts, a phone call or two. These are not interesting enough for such a large recounting. Some might wonder, myself included, why I still have hope for this girl, this temptress. The fact of the matter is that I am interested whether I like it or not. No other girl has emerged to take her place. She holds onto the top spot. A better behaved, less complex girl might be able to wrest the position from her, but there is a noticeable absence of such girls.

My unscheduled, weekly blog should be infinitly shorter than either part of this story. So fear not. Readers will not have to dredge through endless waffle. This is mearly a long introduction to get you up to speed. Information might become a bit scarce are some points and possibly pedantic but it all builds the picture of how the girls me and my friend are interested in are slowly destroying our lives.
Enjoy.

Story so far... (Guy Two) - Part 1

Guy Two — Sun, 22 Apr 2007 09:04:45 GMT

Hey, so there’s this girl. There’s always a girl. From your best friend’s friend to that girl who works as a waitress at the local coffee house to the red-head in maths to the girl-you-met-at-a-party-that-one-time. Girls everywhere.

‘My’ girl works with me and goes to the same college. We work shifts apart but talk when everyone’s together at the end of the day. We don’t take classes together just know each other vaguely. Lately a bit more than vaguely but I’ll get to that later. For now we’ll call her ‘Laura’ as me and my friend won’t be divulging real information like names and places and such.

So I notice her – short (which is good for a guy of my height), fairly long brown hair, thin yet intriguingly curvy. As near as dammit the perfect girl for me looks-wise. Now to find if she’s got the personality to match. A little chatting, some flirting thrown in for good measure. Nice girl, not entirely within the same social group as me but that shouldn’t mean anything so it’s ignored.

Problem. Boyfriend. Abort. Abort…Hang about, boyfriend PROBLEMS. Workable.

Now I’m not the kind of guy who’ll steal a girl from another guy let alone one I used to know but these problems seem to be leading to a dead end anyway. I’m not about to look a gift horse in the mouth so I’ll let them get to the inevitable breakup then go from there.

They break up. Sunbeams and Butterflies. They still hang out…deal with-able. They still act like boyfriend/girlfriend. A slight hiccough? They still kiss. Storm clouds and lightning bolts. Must find out what’s going on.

Turns out they still act as boyfriend/girlfriend because they’ve been going out so long they still depend on each other a little too much. Crap. My interest slowly wanes and ‘Laura’ becomes just another girl I know who I once had a little thing for…

I’ll get the second half of this story up later. I’m sure there’s plenty to read already.

Ciao for now
‘Guy Two’

story so far... (Guy One)

Guy One — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 22:58:12 GMT

Before I start, I’d like to apologise if any of this comes out whiney and sad. It’s the past so I’ve got considered opinions on it. Up to date posts should be a bit more sparky and interesting.

I had a girlfriend for six months. We broke up about a month ago. She decided that she wanted to be single. I can’t blame her for leaving, things were getting dull and we lived a fair distance apart. However, saying that she missed being able to “look at other guys without feeling guilty” amongst other things made me suspicious.

Meh, after about two weeks, I was realising that I like being single, it’s not as crappy as I’d thought. That’s starting to wear off.

For a couple of days, I thought I might be able to spark something off between me and a girl I knew from last year, but that was a let down; she’s hardly interested in talking to me let alone meeting up.

So, now, I move to what will most likely take up most of my ramblings: we’ll call her ‘Elle’.

Essentially, she is an ice queen. For the past 4 years we’ve been playing games. She flirts, I make a move, she overreacts (negatively) and we don’t talk for a while (4 month average). We’ve been pretty close in the past, I’d get invited in for tea, talk to her mum. I’ve even seen her room! (Believe me, it’s a big deal for her.)

So, now I find myself drawn to her again and this time I have the balls to actually work things properly.

There’s more to the history than this but that will come out as I remember it and when it’s appropriate.

Welcome

Guy One — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 22:37:30 GMT

Guy One and Guy Two (although we may not be called this for long) have decided to share our lives with the world. Well, the select portion of it that reads our humble pages.

We will be dealing with the romantic aspects of late teen life. Essentially, we are two guys trying to find two girls. They’ve got to be perfect. Most aren’t.